Wednesday, December 01, 2004

PRETENDING TO HIDE

WHEN I WAS THREE I HID IN THE CLOSET IN MY MOM'S SEWING ROOM TO AVOID HAVING TO ATTEND MY THIRD BIRTHDAY PARTY. A DOZEN KIDS WERE COMING WITH THEIR DOZEN ADORING MOMS, AND THE PROSPECT OF HAVING TO BE THE PRETEXT FOR SUCH A GATHERING WAS SIMPLY TOO MUCH! THANKS, BUT NO THANK YOU! MIDWAY THROUGH THE BIRTHDAY PARTY MY DAD LOCATED ME IN THE CLOSET, AND HE LEAD ME TO THE TABLE IN TIME TO BLOW OUT THE CANDLES ON THE CAKE. I AM TOLD MY RENDITION OF "HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME" WAS PARTICULARLY MEMORABLE...

So it was then, and so it is now. I never have been a very successful social animal (or human),
though occasionally I manage to be a good showman (or show dog).

I remember starting to have PANICS in junior high whenever I was asked what I wanted to do with my life. GOSH! I DIDN'T KNOW! All work seemed pretty meaningless to me. Could I just go to school forever? Please? Maybe I could teach, but my ideas were pretty heretical...I didn't think any school would want me. My nickname was OVERHANG: I wasn't really very proud of my big tits and belly. The girls in my school tended to flirt with other boys.

2 Comments:

At 12:40 PM, Blogger Jed Burack said...

What is it with being the successful social animal? Seems some have it and some don't. I, too, have never had IT. Seems to require an inordinate amount of ability to swallow shit as if it were real delicious. I can swallow shit but just can't seem to convince myself that it doesn't make me want to puke.

 
At 10:30 AM, Anonymous francis said...

Interesting. Whatever in life does not interest you is usually usless to you. And if something has no value to you, there is really no need to pursue it, nor have the burden to attain it.

 

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